The Michigan Film Office has posted a synopsis for Transformers 4 (which I do believe has since been removed). Prepare to have your mind blown -
Like you, my favourite character in the Transformers trilogy was Josh Duhamel's Mr. Military Guy, but I always felt we could do with more.
Hello geeks, welcome to the latest Panels to Frames, where a bitter geek dribbles over the back issue boxes and struggles to form coherent sentences about comic book movies and those floppy paper things with the pictures in them. This week, I'm going to foam at the mouth regarding Transformers 4, the next big root movie Michael Bay is going to screw up.
After Shia LaBeouf got ideas potentially above his station and started burning his blockbuster bridges to star in arthouse porn, talk turned to who would replace him as the needless human face of the giant robot franchise.
In an interview with the LA Times, Michael Bay has hinted that the final instalment of his god-awful Transformers franchise may take the Autobots to outer space, although mercifully they will be leaving Shia LaBeouf behind.
Michael Bay's Transformers series has never been one to gather critical acclaim and that's unlikely to change with his fourth instalment in the multi-million dollar franchise.
One change that does seem to be taking place, though, is that this appears to be the last outing for the explosion-heavy director. The future Ninja Turtles producer also confirmed that Transformers 4 will ring in the changes with regards to the appearances of our favourite Autobots and Decepticons, if his recent quotes at the opening of Transformers: The Ride - 3D are to be believed.
MICHAEL BAY. The man behind some of the highest-grossing films of recent years.
He's the marmite of directors. Some love him. Some loathe him. With a passion that burns hotter than the fire of a thousand suns.
His films are so choc-full of explodey carnage that someone somewhere coined the phrase: "Bayhem" (boak!)
Me? Out of the nine films he has directed, I've enjoyed six. Yes, SIX!
Don't misunderstand me. His films are a million miles away from being anything like perfect. But some of them have been (are still are) damn enjoyable.
The only rational way to process the collective existence of Michael Bay's Transformers movies is to view them as a subversive commentary on the major studio blockbuster and the idea of diminishing returns. That, or some perverse anthropological experiment to measure how much closer we, as a species, are getting to our own version of Idiocracy.
Hollywood is never one to let a cash cow go unmilked. While discussing development plans on Hasbro properties (cinematic staples such as Ouija, Candyland, Risk, Stretch Armstrong and Monopoly), Hasbro CEO Brian Goldner raised the very real possibility of re-teaming with Paramount, Steven Spielberg and Michael Bay for more Transformers movies. Yay.
If you had absolutely any interest in the latest Transformers adventure then it's likely you already paid to see Transformers: Dark Of The Moon. Possibly multiple times, since - at the time of writing - it is the fifth highest grossing movie of all time (worldwide) and just a hair's breadth away from toppling The Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King.